Even More in Love

Ever find yourself looking back and pondering-
how young you were, and how old you felt?
Or how small you were, and how big you felt?
Or how little you knew, but how smart you felt?
It is so interesting to me how perspective changes experience.
And how time changes perspectives.
I am right now in a place of wonder,
thinking about how much more in love I fall with my fiance,
every single day.
Looking back, every day before, it seemed as if I could not love him more than I did that day,
Yet the next day, I find myself falling deeper, farther, harder for the man that holds my heart in his hands each day.
Some people ask me what it is he has done to make me say that-
which almost hurts,
because he doesn't have to do anything.
The things he does for me are plentiful, and I am so grateful for them...
But the things he does are not why I love him,
they have never been why I loved him,
and are not the reason I love him even more with each heartbeat.
I see two types of love within couples-
There is the love that rises and falls based upon moods and events,
arguments and finances....
a love that is legitimate, however it is a love that doesn't always seem....
Happy?
Fulfilling?
Entire...?
but there is this other love-
a love that flows from deep within a heart,
deep within a soul-
a love uncontrolable...
a love that exists in the eternal honeymoon phase-
a love seen in smiles, and laughter,
a love giddy with excitement over the possibilities each new day holds-
a love that doesn't tire with time,
doesn't strain at difficulty,
a love that almost, in itself, seems not to age into comfort.
It is not insecure by anymeans,
but rather...
hardworking...
active...
determined not to settle for the mindset of security, comfort, ease...
a love strengthend by difficulty,
but not changed by it...
it's almost...
in a way...
a love that matures... without growing up.
A love, so beautiful society declines it can exist.
But, I have seen it...
And I have felt it.
And I know, that as much as I love him right now,
I will love him even more tomorrow,
and that my love for him tomorrow doesn't begin to compare with how in love I will be 60 years from now.
Because with each new day comes new experience,
and each new experience leads to a new perspective,
and each new perspective is a chance to learn, grow, discover
another way to love him more.... to love him better.
so here I sit,
smiling at the thought of being in love with him,
giggling over memories had,
and memories yet to be made,
and knowing, without a doubt,
how much I love him.